An area man is winded after a particularly lengthy Wendy's order, the NRA sets 1,000 killed in a school shooting as the amount it would take them to reconsider much of anything, and a Ford assembly line worker is thinking about asking out a cute welding robot from work. It's the week of May 28th, 2012. Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion